Wednesday, March 10, 2021

Dealing With The Last 6 Months

 Hello there my dear Friends. I've now had my bad chronic pain for 6 months and still the Doctor's have no idea what's causing it... Tomorrow on Wednesday 10th March I've got the very long awaited specialist Pain Doctors appointment tomorrow morning. I've been waiting since November last year and accidentally missed the January appointment because I got the day's mixed up. So 4 months waiting basically. My Mum is also going to be coming with me to the appointment with me at the SAN Hospital room's which is great. I'm really hoping and praying that he has some idea of what's causing the pain and to fix it or make it go away for good. I'm so very scared that I'll have to live with this for the rest of my life and I don't want to do that.. I'M SO SCARED that I'll have this bad pain for the rest of my life. I can't imagine dealing with it for years upon years. It feels like that I've been in a huge timewarp, limbo type of thing where my whole life has been on pause. I've had to defer my TAFE studies, having leave from my volunteer job and also my part time/casual job with the dog's. There is so much that I can't do anymore and it's so bloody frustrating. I've had to somehow adapt to so many different things trying to deal with it on a hour by hour, sometimes minute by minute basis to day by day or very short term goals type of thing. I can only do things just a short distance away to where I live... When I drive I'm on weak pain tablets because I don't want to be drowsy when I drive. Then I go home and take some strong pain killers because I'm exhausted dealing with the pain and need to rest for a while. My Doctor has me on an extremely low dose of those painkillers which is hard.. When the painkillers wear off and the pain hits then the days and nights get extremely long.

I wake up several times a night in pain, heat up my heatpack, put music on etc.... I have learnt a few ways of trying to deal with it. Yet it is so debilitating and exhausting that you can't even imagine. My PTSD has also been playing up a whole lot lately as well.  I've also got another specialist Doctors appointment on the 23rd of April that will potentially lead to still more tests to try to find the cause... Please keep my family and I in your prayers at the moment big time... My parent's are really worried as well... I would really do appreciate it so much... Also THANKYOU SO VERY MUCH FOR ALL THE PRAYERS already and the love, care, understanding and support over the last 6 months... I appreciate it so much... 🙏🤗🛐❤⛪💒🙏🤗🛐⛪💒❤

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